The one about 2020, the year we were not warned about.

Omoooo * 10,000,000.

Now now now, someone should have at least given us the heads up that Lucifer was going to find love and use the universe to entertain his girlfriend in 2020. If you do not get my reference, check this out ad by Ryan Reynolds, who by the way is one of my favorite Hollywood actors. His dark humour is topnotch.

The year 2020 is the year I cried the most silent tears as an adult. It started a few days after my birthday when I woke up partially blind, I could not see in one eye. I called my sister and told her not to panic but she definitely panicked more than I did. I was home alone with my nephews so imagine the horror of it all. My sister called my brother to come get me and I am sure he must have driven like a maniac to get to me. By the time he got to me sha, I had started planning my life without one eye. First, I thought I will lose my job, then my business too, what I do requires sight, where do I go from here, all the while crying like a lost puppy.  Anyway, thank God for doctors and thank God for God, I am a full-fledged spectacle wearing human, but my eye still functions well enough.

After this came lock down, I was happy then because traffic was about to end me. However, a few weeks after the lockdown, I was certain I contracted COVID-19. I even documented my symptoms then just to compare with NCDC and other DC’s out there. I COULD NOT BREATH WITHOUT IT FEELING LIKE MY RIBS WERE FALLING APART. I had to type this in caps because unless you experience it, you cannot know what that feeling is like. The human body is really a work of art. It is amazing how many of one’s body parts have to work together to perform a seemingly simple act such as sneezing or coughing. Let me break it down, if I needed to yawn, I now knew all the parts of my body that will get the work done and also where I will feel the pain. There was one night it got so bad that I knelt beside the bed because I could not lay down, I called my sister to hold my hands and pray for me because I was already seeing the signposts of the pearly gates. During this period, I also cried like a bush baby. I had a couple of relapses some weeks after, but I later overcame. This was the year I had the worst migraines of my entire existence, headaches so bad I had to stay in darkness for hours because it felt like my eyeballs will pop out of my sockets at any minute.

After these came the horrible deaths of Ibidunni Ighodalo and Chadwick Boseman, which I wrote about here. I will not want to delve into such dark details again. Soon it was September, my mom’s birthday and I was so glad we got around to do a family photo shoot except for a sibling and some grandkids who were not around. Nothing makes me happier than seeing my mom happy.

Silly me thought all the previous months were exhausting them came October. The ENDSARS protests renewed my hope and crushed it in equal parts. Oh goodness, did I cry! For the man who was hit by a stray bullet in Surulere with his hands still in his pockets, for the young man in Osogbo who was an innocent bystander also shot dead, for all the heartbreaking videos of police shooting people dead on the streets, for the victims of Lekki Massacre who may never get justice when all they did was protest to have at least a decent life, I wept so hard. I thought myself already over being agitated by Nigeria’s issues by now, but boy was I wrong. This toxic love-hate relationship I have with my country is a permanent burden I must carry as long as I draw breath. I hated almost every minute of October and it will remain indelible in my memories for years to come.

November passed in quite a blur because I was just trying hard to push through till the end of the year. The recurring nightmares I got from ENDSARS protests was also giving me sleepless nights. Balancing work and business became much more challenging in November and December that I almost thought to quit one at some point but heyyyy here I am, Dec 31^st, 2020 and still winging both successfully.

2020 was a very challenging and peculiar year. Thank goodness for the myriads of social media challenges we had to keep our humour and sanity when COVID-19 was at its very peak. I am thankful that this year the voices of Nigerians, Africans and black people the world over got to be heard. At the very least, we have taken one step out of oppression and may we see the dawn of a better tomorrow. My discovery of K-dramas was also in 2020, the year of our Lord. It was the distraction I did not know I needed till I got mildly addicted, turns out I am still a romantic at heart despite my coconut head.

My personal life recorded a few wins as well and for that I am grateful. I am most grateful for my friends, I really lucked out in that department. God came through for me in tiny little ways that I hope I appreciated enough.

I know so many people lost so many loved ones this year, my hugs to every single person struggling with grief. I pray for the grace you need to go through this very difficult time. A pandemic means jobs and businesses were shut down, I pray God will make a way for people currently going through this. I cannot stop this without remembering the real MVPs of 2021, our health workers. Shout out to every single one of you, we appreciate your hard work and perseverance.

2021 is nigh and to be honest, I have no clue what I want from it save one thing I have been praying about for 2 years now. I don’t know if that will come across as though I am an unserious adult but it is what it is.

Thank you all for ALWAYS reading my blogs. You may not know how much every single click or comment means to me but rest assured my heart beats duduke when I see the numbers. I APPRECIATE YOU. Duduke was my most played song on Spotify this year by the way, you can listen here .

Here’s to a stressless, pandemic-free, dollar-full 2021!!!

May 2021 be kind to you.

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