The one about the good place.

It feels like I always have to start my blog posts with “long time,no see” or in this case, ‘long time, no posts’ . Let us thank God for life because wiunnnnn, e be tins. Today, I shall tell you about my good place and it is not Lagos, thank goodness.

How have you guys been, especially Nigerians living in Nigeria? How is your mental health? One day, I will write about the events of October as it occured in Nigeria but I am not in that space yet.

Initially, I really had no direction for this post, it was meant to be an outpouring of the so many thoughts in my head. I am glad 2020 is finally drawing to a close. One wicked person on social media said we are all acting as if all of the woes of this year will stop by Dec 31, 2020. I had to pause for a minute and digest that and then I panicked , what if this mess does not end in 2020??? As a Christian, I muttered “God forbid” under my breath after typing this out.

COVID -19 ensured I have been working from home since March. That is nine (9) months of being cooped up in the house. Someone that got pregnant in March will be getting ready for a baby now. If I had known I will spend so long indoors, I would have spent more time outdoors when I had the chance to. I would have LIVED IN THE MOMENT. And just like that, I found a direction to this post, what does it mean for me to live in the moment? I have been analyzing my thoughts and I realised I did not know what my good place is/was.

People always say this “live in the moment” mantra and to be honest , I say it too without knowing what it actually entails in practice. Do you ever randomly pause and think about your life and be like, “yeaaa, I am in a good place”. I think it is those times we are supposed to soak in very consciously and thus “live in the moment“. A good place for me is not a life free of setbacks or just constantly on the rise. It is not a life devoid of worries of adulting. It is simply a point in time where I seem to have no immediate responsibilities or worries looming over me and I can pause to breathe in and out.

For me, it is waking on a Saturday morning, light rainfall just enough to keep the typically hot Lagos weather below boiling temperature, a warm breakfast and snuggle under my covers all day. In those instances, I have it at the back of my mind that I am in a good place both physically and mentally but I never say it out because it sounds dramatic. Upon reflecting, I have found out my good place is usually in the simple things. It is standing on the beach in Cape Verde with the clean chilly air in my lungs, so at peace with myself that I want to sing out loud.

It is when I get a quality bowl of amala with all the attendant protein elements present as should be. It is the excitement I feel when I am about to start a new K-drama romcom. It is the huge smile on my face when I am chatting with my girlfriends over something absolutely cheesy. A good place for me is when my nephew and I are fooling around on Snapchat recording videos we will never post.

So, I finally got it. Living in the moment is about remembering. Remember the exact way you felt when you were at peace with the world. Remember how absolutely delish that shaki was as you rescued it from the seabed of ewedu, the way I felt when snuggled under the covers on a rainy day, the chill air of Cape Verde as it teased my dress around me. Remember the moment where for a minute it felt like you were floating on air and all your worries did not exist.

I am so big on memories so I try to make a lot of memories with friends and family. I also try to capture it on videos and pictures as well so that when life hits me like a wrecking ball, I can go back to those memories and reminisce, laugh and remind myself that the sun will definitely shine again.

*Shaki – beef tripe. A taste of heaven.