I will just jump right into this. Do you believe in reincarnation? I think I do now based off of the behavior of all the newborns being released into our world. Those babies come with their pre-life experiences and it is obvious by their mannerisms and dexterity at eye rolling and shooting disgusting looks when the adult in charge of them moves a bit wild. It could also be because there is more documenting of newborns and life in general due to content creation etc, but that is neither here nor there so my previous stance stands; for now…
That being said, if reincarnation was real, would you like to participate; and also would you like to have the memories of your previous lives so that experience becomes your best teacher literally. This should come in handy when you are making choices and decisions in your current life. Imagine if you already knew studying a particular course in university may not end well because you did in your previous life and it turned out very useless. We could also argue that you can study the same course in Version 2.O of your life and it can have a different outcome because the circumstances in your current life may be more conducive to making it thrive eg, AI courses and some newly minted tech career paths. Anyways, let me tell you why I am really here.
This post was prompted by a conversation I had with my siblings this morning about navigating life and all the mistakes and decisions made by us, our parents, grandparents, cousins, colleagues, nieces, nephews and just people in general on this road called life across career, school, jobs, religion, marriage etc etc . Then, I remembered this K-drama I saw some years ago, I did not necessarily like it but the core of the K-drama is that this is everyone’s first lives so we all ought to be kinder to ourselves in navigating it. I had never gone back to think about it in all the years I saw it but it was somewhat fitting for our conversation and I randomly remembered it.
Post our call, I wondered what I would have done differently if this was my 2nd or 14th life. I would probably not care about anyone deeply knowing I will end up losing them all in this life or maybe I would for the exact reason. I would not take mistakes or missteps so seriously knowing some things never matter in the grand scheme of things. I might be a better friend because I would have like 100 years of experience in being a friend to different kinds of people. For sure, I would be the best lover because 80 cumulative years of being a lover is not a joke, lol. As a parent, I would be exceptional because I would know all the skills required to handle a teenager with raging hormones and remedies for a teething baby. I will probably have the most interesting personality, weave tales with dexterity and keep people enamored in my presence. Naturally, I could never be depressed because I would have been there, done that and my business acumen would be unrivaled, this is why vampires in movies are always rich because you cannot be poor when you have been alive for 400 years, you learn a thing or two about making money.
But this is my first life, so I don’t have luxury of all the afore-mentioned things that could have given me an edge in navigating life; so when I take on a job I think would be my stepping stone and it turns out to be my stumbling block instead; I should be kind to myself and say “well, I did what i thought was best”. When life brings an opportunity to relocate to another country and I grab it and it does not work out; I should say “well, we try again somewhere else”. When I fumble a bag (people, places, love, opportunities and chances), I am kind to myself because this is my first life, I came here with zero (0) experience.
All of the above sounds cute and easy to do but I have been in those shoes and I berated myself for months for messing things up on several occasions. My brother mentioned something to me one day that stuck with me for a while, he said “you did the best you could with the information you had at the time“. I started this year conscious of that and even though there are things I wished turned out differently, I tell myself that I picked the best option I could at the time I did. I am not responsible for how things turn out, I bear the consequences obviously but the way it turns out is outside of my span of control. I can control how i navigate the consequences and outcome but never why it happens.
All this is to encourage someone today, yes the marriage failed, yes the job you wanted so desperately ended up sucking but you can’t even say it out loud, yes you should have said yes to that offer, yes you should have left earlier so you did not miss your flight; but you did not and that is okay, because this is your first life and you are only human.
